Late in the fourth quarter of Wednesday's Bucks-Kings game, Reggie Evans found himself sprawled out on the floor. This isn't too uncommon for Evans; he'll throw his body around for the greater good from time to time. What was uncommon was that he was thrust there by Ersan Ilyasova. Now Ersan is pretty mild-mannered on the court for the most part, so for such a reaction to occur, there must have been one heck of an instigating action from Evans, or so we think. For reference, here is the play in question, courtesy of our Bucksketball friend K.L. Chouinard:.
The two had been battling down low for a large portion of the night and it had been getting rather physical, so the logical explanation here would be to suggest that frustration + physical nature = altercation. However, Ersan didn't just deliver a regular shove. He went deep into his being, going Wild Turkey and bulldozed him. This was no mere basketball act; no, this was white-hot rage, even if Joey Crawford and company called it as merely a loose ball foul.
We may never know what really happened, but that will not stop us from speculating with hopes of coming across the truth one day. I've come up with a short list of possibilities and encourage you to do the same. First, let's introduce the leader in the clubhouse:
@ericbuenning Wild guess: He offered to take him to Taco Bell for breakfast.— Aron Yohannes (@AronYohannes) March 6, 2014
Solid hypothesis. That breakfast taco looks quite unappetizing. It'd make me quite upset if someone offered to take me there for that.
- Evans kept purposefully calling him "Ear-san," then proceeded to flick his ear. Ersan does not like it when you flick his ears (probably. Nobody does, really).
- Evans rubbing his beard against the back of Ersan's neck
- Consistent ''gobble gobble'' taunts'.
- Evans simply yelled "Hike!" and Ersan, in a moment of confusion, thought he was on a(n American) football field. Give credit to him, though. He finished the block.
- Evans told Ersan that he beat Flappy Bird. Ersan, still having trouble getting a double digit score, flipped out in a jealous rage
- Evans made a crack about James Franco. Ersan replied with, "BLASPHEMY [punch]. HOW DARE YOU? [shove]."
- Ersan saw that Evans was eating Triscuits on the bench and decided to give Evans a hands-on demonstration of the effect that those gross "crackers" can have on your digestive system
- [Added by Frank:] Hobo Ersan's ninja lessons are finally paying off? (eternal h/t to Jon Hartzell)
Hobo Ersan has definitely surpassed Emo Bogut as my all-time favorite Bucks alter-ego. pic.twitter.com/ALtHimNk8U— Frank Madden (@brewhoop) December 11, 2013
That's all we've been able to come up with so far. If you have any other ideas, feel free to drop them in the comments. With your help, we'll get to the bottom of this in no time.